How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?
2 How long must I take counsel in my soul
and have sorrow in my heart all the day?
How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?3 Consider and answer me, O Lord my God;
light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death,
4 lest my enemy say, “I have prevailed over him,”
lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken.5 But I have trusted in your steadfast love;
my heart shall rejoice in your salvation.
6 I will sing to the Lord,
because he has dealt bountifully with me.Psalm 13
1The oracle that Habakkuk the prophet saw.
2 O Lord, how long shall I cry for help,
and you will not hear?
Or cry to you “Violence!”
and you will not save?Habakkuk 1
“Why Me?” Doesn’t this cross your mind when you are going through tough times? The Bible is filled with laments. In fact 70 percent of the Psalms are laments. There is even a book called Lamentations.
What is a lament in the Bible? To lament is to express deep regret, grief, or sorrow. We can lament through words or actions.
We lament when we grieve over the loss of someone or something dear to us. Grief is a common human experience, and even Jesus grieved (John 11:35). We lament when are hearts are broken. We lament when we feel helpless in our situations. The Bible teaches us to lament over our sin.
Sorrow is sacred. Suffering is not an indictment against God; it can be the single space we identify most deeply with Christ, who knows it best.
If we fail to dig into a theology of suffering and the way we as Christ followers will hurt right alongside a troubled world, we write off people’s trials as an anomaly or a reaping they had coming instead of a place we connect with God’s solace and peace and even our purpose in walking with and weeping with those who weep.
What if instead we were a people who learned to lament? What if we believed faith was less about blind devotion to all the right answers and more of an invitation to come fully into relationship with Christ and be met in our most desperate and confusing moments? Lament . . . is an admission of our profound weakness and inability to carry a single thing on our own.
To stay in relationship with God, when our worlds turn upside down and nothing makes sense, He invites us to lament.¹
To stay in relationship with God, when our worlds turn upside down and nothing makes sense, He invites us to lament. -Alia Joy
Lament is not the same as crying, however. It’s different. And it’s uniquely Christian.
The Bible is filled with this song of sorrow. . . The book of Lamentations weeps over the destruction of Jerusalem. Jesus lamented in the final hours of his life . . . Lament is a form of prayer. It is more than just the expression of sorrow or the venting of emotion. Lament talks to God about pain. And it has a unique purpose: trust. It is a divinely-given invitation to pour out our fears, frustrations, and sorrows for the purpose of helping us to renew our confidence in God.
Lament is . . . uniquely Christian. -Mark Vroegop
Four Elements of Lament
As Psalm 13 illustrates, most laments feature four essential elements:
- Turn to God. Often a lament begins by an address to God: “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?” The point is that the person in pain chooses to talk to God about what is happening.
- Bring your complaint. Every lament features some kind of complaint: “How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?” More than a sinful rehearsing of our anger, biblical lament humbly and honestly identifies the pain, questions, and frustrations raging in our souls.
- Ask boldly for help. Seeking God’s help while in pain is an act of faith: “Consider and answer me, O Lord my God; light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death, lest my enemy say, ‘I have prevailed over him,’ lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken” Unremitting sorrow can create a deadly silence as Fwe give in to despair (“there’s no hope”) or denial (“everything’s fine”). But lament invites us to dare to hope in God’s promises as we ask for his help.
- Choose to trust. This is the destination for our laments. All roads lead here: “But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me” More than the stages of grief, this prayer language moves us to renew our commitment to trust in God as we navigate the brokenness of life.
Lament is the prayer language for God’s people as they live in a world marred by sin. It is how we talk to God about our sorrows as we renew our hope in his sovereign care. To cry is human, but to lament is Christian.²
It is how we talk to God about our sorrows as we renew our hope in his sovereign care. -Mark Vroegop
You may want to write down your own prayer of lament using the words “though” and “yet” to begin to phrase your lament. Do this when you are facing difficulty. Save this exercise in prayer for the hard moments in your life.
- Find a quiet place with God – Being alone with Him is a necessity for this kind of prayer.
- Ask the Holy Spirit to guide you – He will lead you in a prayer of lament. He will open up your heart to God.
- Be in God’s presence – We are often so much in a hurry but a prayer of lament takes time spent in God’s presence. Give yourself wholly to God.
- Write down the “though” circumstances in your life – What difficulties and challenges are you right now facing? What pain or grief do you feel? These are the “though” circumstances.
- Offer these things to God – Offer God the hard things as a sacrifice. Don’t ask for anything.
- Worship God by completing the phrase – “Though these things have happened, yet _________.” – Worship God in a series of yet statements. Bless and praise Him even in spite of the difficult things.³
The Bible gives us many examples of laments. God has given us these laments so that we know that He understands our anguish. The Psalms are a good template for writing your own lament. God invites us to pour our hearts out to Him through these prayers.
¹Alia Joy, Glorious Weakness: Discovering God in All We Lack (Baker Books, 2019), pp. 146-161.
²Mark Vroegop https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/dare-to-hope-in-god, April 6, 2019
³Debbie Przybylski https://www.crosswalk.com/faith/prayer/pouring-out-your-heart-in-lament-to-god.html, August 27, 2014
All Scriptures English Standard Version.
Carol Lowe / Co-Founder of Enlighten Mental Health Ministry. She struggled with Bipolar Disorder most of her life, but has been able to manage her mental illnesses through community and medication. She enjoys spending time with her husband and dog, Kona. She lives in Thousand Oaks, CA, with her husband, Curtis Lowe, who is the pastor of the Chinese Christian Church of Thousand Oaks.
4 Comments
Aili Coop Kajdan · August 23, 2020 at 9:03 pm
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admin · October 23, 2020 at 6:03 pm
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admin · October 23, 2020 at 6:04 pm
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